Prepared psychologically for the death of my parents...

[AlexKid]

....still get nervous when delivery man comes







WTF is with anxiety and worry? Very tough to get rid of!?

[Zaroku]

my dad died in my arms.. 5 years ago.

he was in the hospital, and i ordered my mom to pull the tricity that made him breathe.


i do not understand your fear of what is natural.

fear not...

perhaps my ***ish studies and beliefs took over.. it was a beautiful thing.. i kissed him on his forehead and nose. and he was no more.

i will see him again...

fear not alexkid...fear is a waste of time.

i can see mount fuji, from my lil home by the sea, it is blows, i go with it. I am good with that. Good enough for me.

[AlexKid]

my dad died in my arms.. 5 years ago.

he was in the hospital, and i ordered my mom to pull the tricity that made him breathe.


i do not understand your fear of what is natural.

fear not...

perhaps my ***ish studies and beliefs took over.. it was a beautiful thing.. i kissed him on his forehead and nose. and he was no more.

i will see him again...

fear not alexkid...fear is a waste of time.

i can see mount fuji, from my lil home by the sea, it is blows, i go with it. I am good with that. Good enough for me.

Ty bro for the kind words

Tyson Fury is champ of the world fights with courage everyday, hes still a pu.ssy as well, (suffers pannick attacks so an even bigger pu.ssy than me) why is social anxiety so deeply ingrained?

[Zaroku]

Ty bro for the kind words

Tyson Fury is champ of the world fights with courage everyday, hes still a pu.ssy as well, (suffers pannick attacks so an even bigger pu.ssy than me) why is social anxiety so deeply ingrained?

when my first wife divorced me, because i was violent.. not to her, .... never.... my sister told her i smashed a guy.. she left me... i pulled over many times.. on the 101 headed north to San Franciso...

i was shaking... and pulled over so I did not crash my car... i took meds for a few weeks, they did not help..

i had to realize my wife is gone... left me.. for being violent.. but not to her... i got issues..

my current wife... is better in all ways.. and she talks shcit to me.. all the time... i laugh like the fool i am..

GOD has blessed me...

you will be fine.. fear not..

[AlexKid]

when my first wife divorced me, because i was violent.. not to her, .... never.... my sister told her i smashed a guy.. she left me... i pulled over many times.. on the 101 headed north to San Franciso...

i was shaking... and pulled over so I did not crash my car... i took meds for a few weeks, they did not help..

i had to realize my wife is gone... left me.. for being violent.. but not to her... i got issues..

my current wife... is better in all ways.. and she talks shcit to me.. all the time... i laugh like the fool i am..

GOD has blessed me...

you will be fine.. fear not..

its a shame u were violent but not to your wife, almost like u owe her, go to her?

[Zaroku]

its a shame u were violent but not to your wife, almost like u owe her, go to her?

she's happy without me.. i won't intrude on her new life. her husband is a good man.. better than me.

knowing she is happy, makes me feel happy..

she was great, beautiful, smart, nice smile. I am happy she found her proper partner.

i found my proper partner.. she keeps me in line.. i need that.
i grew up in a ******.. fighting is fun.. i love it.. my wife is saying. yeah yeah you beat up some big jap guy.. he did not know how to fight.. you need to fight a guy like you, angry, mean, and 215 lbs.

she says, papa, i am going to buy this or that. i just say.. you will do it even if i say no..

she needs no permission. i love her. we laugh at how well we have done, money wise, etc.

i still wear my old suits from time to time, tailor made in London. If I drop weight to 185 my wife is like, are you sick? eat more.. why don't you get fat.. genetics..

concentration camp survivors.. epi genetics.

[AlexKid]

she's happy without me.. i won't intrude on her new life. her husband is a good man.. better than me.

knowing she is happy, makes me feel happy..

she was great, beautiful, smart, nice smile. I am happy she found her proper partner.

i found my proper partner.. she keeps me in line.. i need that.
i grew up in a ******.. fighting is fun.. i love it.. my wife is saying. yeah yeah you beat up some big jap guy.. he did not know how to fight.. you need to fight a guy like you, angry, mean, and 215 lbs.

she says, papa, i am going to buy this or that. i just say.. you will do it even if i say no..

she needs no permission. i love her. we laugh at how well we have done, money wise, etc.

i still wear my old suits from time to time, tailor made in London. If I drop weight to 185 my wife is like, are you sick? eat more.. why don't you get fat.. genetics..

concentration camp survivors.. epi genetics.

re epigenetics

not my fault, not intended i was trying to be mature peaceful u guys were not, its more your fault than mine, i guess its easier to punish me than to accept that hard truth that your behavior caused alot of the harm

also it probably didnt and u could have been depressed anyway since u r already prone

[Zaroku]

re epigenetics

not my fault, not intended i was trying to be mature peaceful u guys were not, its more your fault than mine, i guess its easier to punish me than to accept that hard truth that your behavior caused alot of the harm

also it probably didnt and u could have been depressed anyway since u r already prone

well said

for what it might be worth, taking responsibility for your own actions is Sine qua non

can be translated literally as "Without which, not". Though this may sound like gibberish, it means more or less "Without (something), (something else) won't be possible". Sine qua non sounds slightly literary, and it shouldn't be used just anywhere.

then i start thinking causal and non casual systems, math programming, etc..

i do not even go into it on this site.

for what it is worth... laugh.. as much as you can.. laugh at yourself..

cat stevens, my dad's favorite brit. wrote great songs.

oh very young..



regrets, i got more than a fair share... but... once you can forgive yourself, then you can forgive others.

exploring yourself, knowing yourself, understanding your thoughts, and then... breaking free..

[AlexKid]

well said

for what it might be worth, taking responsibility for your own actions is Sine qua non

can be translated literally as "Without which, not". Though this may sound like gibberish, it means more or less "Without (something), (something else) won't be possible". Sine qua non sounds slightly literary, and it shouldn't be used just anywhere.

then i start thinking causal and non casual systems, math programming, etc..

i do not even go into it on this site.

for what it is worth... laugh.. as much as you can.. laugh at yourself..

cat stevens, my dad's favorite brit. wrote great songs.

oh very young..



regrets, i got more than a fair share... but... once you can forgive yourself, then you can forgive others.

exploring yourself, knowing yourself, understanding your thoughts, and then... breaking free..

well forgive yourself please


Im getting cryogenically frozen if they dont extend the aging process enough or i get cancer etc

theres a chance because of the rate of technological advancement


There is hope, it may not be that great, but its better than when we just used to pile rocks on top of someone

[Zaroku]

well forgive yourself please


Im getting cryogenically frozen if they dont extend the aging process enough or i get cancer etc

theres a chance because of the rate of technological advancement


There is hope, it may not be that great, but its better than when we just used to pile rocks on top of someone

some of my friends, close close friends, are at singularity university... a fake school, but google, amazon, etc execs are investing heavily in how to transfer their essence into a machine.



i actually know what I am talking about.. my close buddies who have too much money, want to live forever..

they want others like you, not me.. but they want everyone to die, and have no kids.. they want to be like GODS.

i am a ***... I want to sleep with my ancestors.. i do not want to live without my wife, my kids, my friends..

we are confined by space and time.. money, money.. if you make big money.. like i used to make,... you have no time... when you have time... you do not have money..

kid.. i know things, and people who burn my yearly salary at a barmitzvah....300k plus bonus..it is nothing to them.. their security get more than that..

i am glad God gives me just what I need daily. I do not know how I would survive if I had big bucks..

id probably kill myself.. thank god.. i have work, and purpose. i just rely on GOD to sustain me.

***ish 101