The dumbest thing you ever done while drunk

[lopetego]

Damn there have been several

falling backwards in a club while carrying a bucket full of beer, most of the beer was lost, it was a mess

peeing in a cooking pot because I couldn't find the bathroom in a house

throwing a bottle at a police car

crashing my car against a police car (well, not an actual police car, but an off duty cop was the driver)

crashing my car against the box of a parked semi truck, my poor car became a convertible

walking on all fours in front of the people at the party because I couldn't stand up, while yelling I don't remember what

probably more that I don't remember right now

[Mike D]

Damn there have been several

falling backwards in a club while carrying a bucket full of beer, most of the beer was lost, it was a mess

peeing in a cooking pot because I couldn't find the bathroom in a house

throwing a bottle at a police car

crashing my car against a police car (well, not an actual police car, but an off duty cop was the driver)

crashing my car against the box of a parked semi truck, my poor car became a convertible

walking on all fours in front of the people at the party because I couldn't stand up, while yelling I don't remember what

damn dude

especially the last one

[Citizen Koba]

Oh ****... I don't even know where to begin. A lot of them are actually more like... well I woke up (insert random place) and then...

Damn a coupla of the single most epic drunken fails (and I ain't even including some real dark or criminal ones)... used to have kinda party trick I started doing while I was still at school, get drunk, run along the roofs of parked cars, go right down the street, think my record was like 14. Anyways so I'm like 22 at this point don't recall what I'd been drinking... definitely some Jack and some vodka in there, anyways, ****faced. Middlle of Manchester - not the kinda suburban streets I'd done it on as the kid - and also no longer a kid - just up and run over the roofs of a full row of parked cars down Oxford Street... musta done 10, 12 before there's a gap too big to jump.

Worth bearing in mind I was kinda running with the punks at this time (although I was done skinhead) and the only footwear I owned were a pair of surplus German army motorcycle courier boots with metal kick-clips on the front and steel caps so god only knows the fkn mess I left on folks' paintwork... anyways.

Finish the row of cars.. stroll on - kinda puffed up proud of myself - then about 10 seconds later I'm grabbed from behind, big hand each side and lifted and bodily carried across the road into Jilly's rockworld, a rock club that I used to go in most Fridays for the all-nighters. Anyways... the proprietor was something of a notable gentleman with underworld connections and it turned out that amongst the other vehicles I'd stomped across with my big fkn German courier boots was his antique Jaguar XJ6.... basically the threats flew and I did take a pretty good kicking but the thing mainly saved me from getting dumped in the canal was the fact that I was pretty well known in the club and enough people saw me getting dragged in that questions woulda been asked...

Then there was the time on Teneriffe, living on the beach... **** I was 2/3 crazy by then anyway... went full blown psychosis few months later so maybe that's contributory. Every day used to do this thing where I'd buy a 5 litre water bottle, two litres of the shit cheap red wine, this was pre-Euro so it was in pesetas and I forget the conversion now but it worked out about a quid and a half for a litre of wine, a litre of vodka (about a fiver) two litres of OJ and I'd drink the water by about midday (or just pour the rest out if I hadn't), fill up the whole mfing thing with the unholy mix of Vodka, vino and OJ... spend the rest of the day drinking it. When it got dark find a secluded corner out of sight of the guardia, light a fire, maybe drunkenly drag a coupla girls back... used to bum or steal food from the supermarcado or sometimes get the evening catch off the fishermen. Get a kinda grill going from scrap chickenwire.

Anyways... some reason dunno what happened, drank more than usual one night or maybe I did some drugs and forgot, found myself swimming fully clothed across the bay in the pitch black... and somehow in my head I was trying to make a getaway from somewhere or something... no fcukin idea what. Swimming and swimming till I was fkn knackered and the shoreline didn't seem to be getting closer. Felt like damn hours getting colder. Somehow finally drag myself out of the water up the beach and into a bar but somehow in my head I'm making an escape from the ****s or some weird **** - like y'know, Steve McQueen in the great escape? Cept the bar I end up in everyone's talking German and IDK I just vaguely remember remonstrating with some dude about taking me back to the English side and doing a prisoner exchange or some crazy ****. IDK..

Woke up the next day on the roadside by a bench next to the beach with a black eye and a desert mouth smelling of piss. Not my finest moment.

[just the facts]

got banned from the forum

For making racist posts?

[TheMyspaceDayz]

I was at a dance and I face planted into a far end of a collapsible table. I nearly broke my nose as the one side folded and about 20 beers slid into me. Sobered right up. I tell my date we got to get the hell out of here because I just pissed off a whole table of people. She pretends like she doesn’t know me. Then my cousin comes out of nowhere and says “we got to get the hell out of here” lol. Went through the back door and escaped without harm.

[TheMyspaceDayz]

I feel like I have way too many stories like this.

[Zaroku]

Fell down face first and woke up with an old hag!

[BodyBagz]

Ugly women are usually involved